Sunday, December 30, 2007

Reminiscing

It's been really busy during the holidays this year. It seems that I have not had time for much of anything except going here and there. Plus, we had a couple of acquaintances pass away over the holidays. And really close to Chistmas. We went to the funeral of one of them last week. Such a sad thing to happen, but really bad at Christmas.

This morning I woke up with a scratchy throat and I decided to stay home today and rest and take medicine in hopes of kicking this thing before it gets any worse. I was really disappointed because I was supposed to go and get a complimentary free lesson on the hammered dulcimer from a coworker's husband, who teaches it. He said he would give me a lesson so that I could see if I am interested in it and also information on renting a hammered dulcimer. I can't afford to buy one right now, but I would rather just save my money and buy my own rather than throw my money away renting one. On the other hand, if I rented one and decided it wasn't for me, at least I wouldn't be out much money, so I'll have to think about that for a little while.

Last night Eddie and I went to a friend's house. It's actually my house, but we rent it to them and they are also our friends. As landlords, we have a key to the house and we have their permission to go in at any time to do repair work, etc. We are very close friends and trusting of each other. We always get together with them on Friday and/or Saturday nights and play Phase 10. I happened to get to their house early last night before they got home from work, so I called our friend on my cell phone and asked if it was ok if I went ahead and went inside the house to wait for them. It wasn't a problem, so I went on in. It was quite a while before they got home, about 45 minutes. I noticed that the cover was up on their piano. Since I've been really longing to learn to play an instrument this next year, I decided to fool around on the piano for awhile. It was alot of fun. I didn't learn to play anything, but I played around on the keys and had a nice time by myself before they got home.

When I was a little girl, I had an aunt (my mother's sister) who decided that I would learn to play the piano. She decided this without my permission. I wasn't interested at all. She even went so far as to buy a piano for me and pay for piano lessons. Talk about ungrateful. I was definitely that. The piano lessons were every Saturday morning while cartoons were on. Being a child, naturally, I didn't want to take piano lessons while cartoons were on. I did not practice, and after awhile the piano teacher finally told my aunt that I wasn't interested at all and that she was wasting her money. I was relieved, but I'm sure my aunt was really disappinted in me. She eventually sold the piano to my uncle (her brother) because his wife did play piano. Another sad part to this story is that later on, his housed burned and the piano burned up in the house.

I didn't think much about it then, being a child, but now that I'm grown, I think back on all that happened, and feel a tragic sense of loss and even a little guilt too. Loss because I wish more than anything that I had been interested at that age and had practiced. Guilt because I didn't even appreciate that beautiful piano and it later came to its demise because of that. Oh, I know that wasn't really my fault because the same thing could have happened at my house, but I still feel badly about it all. I can't help but feel that if I had really taken an interest and practiced that I might have been able to play the piano and might even still have that very piano in my possession today.

It's sort of like Eddie said tonight. You can't go back and change any of that. And I said, no I can't, but I can change what I do in the future. So, the thought has crossed my mind that I might even take piano lessons. The reason it two-fold. First, because I work at a community college, I can take piano or any kind of music lessons for free. Second, our friends are wanting to sell the piano and if we had the money I could buy it and have it moved to my house. I just don't know if I want to do that and then be stuck with it if I decide piano is not for me.

I've been thinking about New Year's Resolutions, as I'm sure we all are. I'm not going to make the usual promise to lose weight, etc. because in the past I felt badly because it never seemed to work out. I've decided that I'm not going to make any resolutions this year, but just think about things that I would like to accomplish this next year. One is that I would like to learn to read music and learn to play a musical instrument of some kind. I know that both of those things take commitment and practice, but I think I could do it for something I really want to do.

I've been thinking about what sparked this latest interest in wanting to learn to play a musical instrument. I've always loved music and wanted to play something, but I think I know exactly what got me to thinking about it most recently. Before Christmas this year, I went with my cousin to his boss's home for her annual Christmas party. We had a nice dinner, played games, and did a Chinese gift swap. Afterward, his boss played Christmas carols for us on her harp. I thought it was so enchanting and beautiful to listen to her play. It just renewed my desire to learn to play something. I know it takes practice, but it has taken her about 5 years to learn to play and I know she's taken some lessons.

It is my desire this year to learn to read music and learn to play something. At this point in time, I'm not exactly sure what that instrument is. I know that many people play more than one instrument, so I know that's a possibility too. I'm hopeful that as I research it and find out more information, that something will reveal itself to me. Whatever will be, will be, so I'll just have to wait and see in which direction I go.

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